So if you live your life in a three piece suit,
In a cocktail dress, or combat boots
You pick your path and you walk your truth
And the world will come round to you.

Pop the cork, a champagne glass
Raise to the future, drink to the past
Thank the Lord for the friends he cast,
In the play he wrote for you.

Wednesday, March 31, 2004

Words of the day:

nuance: a subtle difference or variation, a gradation (i.e. nuances of style)

chagrin: disquietude or distress of mind caused by embarrassment or humiliation; mental unease caused by failure or disappointment (i.e. to her chagrin, the party ended as she arrived)

inundate: to overwhelm or flood (i.e. theatre inundated with ticket requests)

de facto: in reality/actuality; exercising power or serving a function without being legally or officially established (i.e. de facto governments such as cartels(?))

There were other words I heard recently and wanted to look up but gaugh. stupid memory like a gold fish.



You know the whole chinese mentality to optimize your time and resources by all means? Well here I was thinking I would like some Indian butter chicken and rice for dinner but, it goes in the oven. Hence, need something else in the oven if i'm going to turn that baby on. (quiet to all you people with filthy filthy minds!) Ergo, my mission to make PC Organic brownies follows. These two things have to be on different temperatures at different times though. Argh. But wait! The one that needs more time is on a lower temperature! (and vice versa, the one that needs less time requires a higher temperature)...you guys thinking what i'm thinking? YEAP! good old fashioned averaging! So...one is on 325F for 35 min. The other is 375F for 25min. Thus, 350F for 30min sounds about right.

Note to self: rice made from PC frozen dinners really isn't as bad as i thought it would be! Imho, it beats Uncle Bens and Stouffers and what ever else instant rice I've had before. The chicken was actually good in that there wasn't any of that fatty ish and bony buff that other dinners have. Sauce was Indian style as I've had at Indian restaurants but not as creamy (haha way to go for butter chicken, eh?).

Note to self #2: there is NO visual way to tell if brownies are burnt. I mean, really. It's easy to say 'oh, yeah those cookies are looking golden brown' but for something that's dark, dark brown to begin with?! *sigh*....when they say not to overbake, they really mean it. Having said that, they're really rich brownies (the sides were just a wee bit burnt but it was all salvagable) and not that bad -- wish they weren't as sweet though.

And therein lies my dinner.

Now for some more news...I took a personality assessment workshop on Tuesday and found out I've really changed a lot. I mean, I started off as INFP when I did the test online a few months ago. Then my self-assessment read ESTP. But, the actual Myers-Briggs test came back INTJ (two letter deviation!). For those of you who don't know what these mean, take a read through of Myers-Briggs tests; you're one of E-I / S-N / F-T / J-P for extravert-intravert / sensing-iNtuitive / feeling-thinking / judging-perceiving. What's insane is that the results really write me well.

What does Myers-Briggs say about me?
INTJ: Have original minds and great drive for implementing their ideas and achieving their goals. Quickly see patterns in external events and develop long-range explanatory perspectives. When committed, organize a job and carry it through. Skeptical and independent, have high standards of competence and performance for themselves and others.

Too much stress for an INTJ can manifest itself behaviourally as:

Edgy, arrogant, argumentative, impatient:
If bombarded with too many demands, details, and interpersonal needs, INTJs move to an apparent impatience and disdain for the events and people in their immediate presence.
(Note: this is SOOOO true! Those around me -- and i'm sure you guys have noticed it too -- know that I get edged and impatient when I just have a lot on my mind that I feel I need to get done. *sigh* I'm sorry!)

A seduction about capabilities and failures:
As stress mounts and the INTJ's competencies are tested, they seduce themselves into believing that the situation is nothing serious and all that's required is for them to exercise greater control. This mental state is interspersed with flashes of self-doubt and assumed failures market with extreme self-criticism.
(Note: also very true since I always think that it's my fault when I just don't have control over situations anymore. Irrevocably, I want a scapegoat but I usually end up crying to myself about why I suck.)

A marked increase in distrusting others:
Distrust can be projected outward as disbelief. (This issue is so clear to the INTJ, how can anyone disagree?) They believe that other are out ot get them or to undermine their work.
(Note: haha that's right -- the world is out to get me! I know you all!!! :-) )

What do you guys think?


Monday, March 29, 2004

I think it was a big disappointment for a lot of people (especially me) when they found out about Cecilia Zhang (news story...). *sigh* First, i was really surprised because of all missing child cases, i REALLY REALLY wanted this one to turn out okay despite now the odds were looking. There was so much international publicity, the community tried to come together, there was money offered and it just came to nothing. Like -- what sick person does that?! And it hits home because it is home. I mean, i was biking along a nearby trail last year and saw the 'in memory' of the 14-year-old girl who went missing; I knew she was found but I didn't know her body was found that close to where I lived. When I heard about Cecilia, it surprised me because she lived so close and I pass by the area all the time. I always felt that it was safe place around here but it's not. I mean, I even have these moments when I'm coming home that I'm semi on-the-lookout for a little, Chinese girl on the way kind of hoping i'd find her (and no, i never really told anyone this before).... but yeah, it just really sucks that this was the outcome.